Christian Humor

Christian One-Liners

• Don’t let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
• Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
• Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
• People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
• Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
• Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.
• If the parish wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
• God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
• Peace starts with a smile.
• Be ye fishers of men. You catch them – He’ll clean them.
• Forbidden fruits create many jams.
• Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
• God grades on the cross, not the curve.
• If God is your Co-pilot – swap seats!
• Don’t wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
• God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
• Don’t give God instructions — just report for duty!
• Don’t tell God about your big problems, tell the problems about your big God.
• The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
• The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
• The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

 

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